I had a good long cross country ski on the plateau east of Wanoga Snow Park. The sky looked blue enough to dive into and the Cascade Mountains were visible from the ridge line that hems in the flat lands. The snow was deep so I didn’t make good time but I trudged along for nearly three hours, glad to be sweating and pushing my heart and lungs to capacity. The bunion on my baby toe didn’t hurt much; it is pretty numb I think from the cortisone. However, that doesn’t mean the pain is gone. As I suspected the sharp twinges aren’t really caused by the bunion and I don’t even know if I have a bunion. There is a BB-sized pellet just under the skin atop the bunion and that is where the tenderness emanates from. I can pinch it between my fingers and it hurts like hell. I asked doctor smarty pants about this little lump and he said it was some sort of blood blister that should go away. It aches so bad from my ski trip this morning that even my ratty old tennis shoes cause me grief. I’m down to wearing socks only.

 

I’m sure Western medicine has its place in society and that there are plenty of good doctors. However, it has been my experience that the only one you can really trust to know what is wrong, and right, with your body is your own self. Unfortunately, most Americans have been brainwashed not to trust themselves and to put all of their faith in professionals. Time and time again I’ve figured out what was the matter with me even when doctors couldn’t. There have been plenty of situations where I didn’t do what doctors told me to and I ended up being right. Doctors are not omniscient, they have certain skills and knowledge that many of us don’t have, but in my opinion they should be used by individuals as tools in one’s own guest to understand and treat your body. Just as it is inappropriate for doctors to think they are all-knowing gods, it is equally wrong for the person seeking medical advice to give away his or her power. I spend a lot of time tuning into my body so I know it intimately. When something is amiss it is my responsibility to figure out the problem and best solution. A doctor can be one of the tools I use to make these determinations. Always, though, I am in charge.

 

For now, I’ll try to be a patient patient and give the cortisone more time; maybe it will fix everything eventually but I have my reservations.